All of Her Things

Today is our first wedding anniversary! So much has happened, but this year flew by, and I feel like we’ve only been married for like three months.

I remember sitting with my parents at the Cheesecake Factory in Freehold, NJ, in November 2023, discussing our engagement and wedding plans. We shared our intention to get married in 3.5 months. I didn’t want anything extravagant; in fact, I preferred to marry at City Hall in Philadelphia, expecting only our parents to attend. However, they weren’t performing weddings at that time, so I went with the next best thing. I envisioned an intimate wedding day with our closest friends and family, no more than 25 people. Then we could invite everyone to a wedding party or reception in Germany in March. My dad warned me that some people would be upset about this decision, and he was right. People weren’t happy, but we had to do what was best for us.

I’m a Sagittarius, and there’s this idea that we know what we want and want it now. The way I accelerated this wedding process was probably the most Sagittarius thing I could do, but there’s more to it. My intuition told me to do this exactly how I wanted, not only to relieve the stress of the wedding but also knowing that I’d need to prepare for significant changes. We considered postponing the wedding reception to 2025, but I’m glad we didn’t bring that stress into this year. We realized we needed to get the wedding out of the way.

Over the weekend, Seb and I discussed what our lives might have been like if we had postponed our wedding. We would have needed to continue traveling between our countries for the entire year, spending a good chunk of time apart in 2025 (since you can only stay 90 out of 180 days as a tourist in the US and Germany). Amidst our engagement, work became so stressful that I found myself crying at my desk between meetings, and by January, I just couldn’t handle it anymore. I wonder what would have happened if I had pushed through the year while also traveling to Germany… likely more stress.

This past year was stressful, but in the grand scheme of things, getting married when we did was perfect timing. I felt confident in my decision to leave my job, ultimately allowing us to choose where to live. Being married helped us speed up a few processes in Germany, so we don’t have to separate again. It’s given me the ability to decide what to do with my apartment and belongings in the US. I can’t imagine having to put all of this off for another year because there’s still so much to do.

Looking back at all the pictures I took in 2024, I see two of the happiest people creating beautiful memories together. However, I also think about the behind-the-scenes moments and how stressed we were trying to figure ourselves out. I’m so glad we chose to do what we wanted without succumbing to the societal pressures of an expensive wedding. I’m happy we ended up here, choosing a more restful year.

My love, I can’t imagine doing this life with anyone else. With you in my corner, all the stresses of this year have been significantly minimized. You are my calm and my strength, and I’m so proud to be your wife. Happy anniversary!

Ich liebe dich.